ALRIGHT!!!!
I FINALY got some real help from the "EA Support" team.
I was told to run the "autorun", then select "install"... (Even though the game was already installed) after a few seconds, rather than asking for a cd key, or going through any of the setup process, the game simply started up.
Perhaps this forced the game to re-run the "setup.exe" file, spawning a new ".dat" file...? no idea, seemed too simple.
But, for the last hour or so, I've been playing just fine, no "exploding" units, or instant "DEFEAT".
One bit of help I WAS able to squeeeeeze out of the tech guy was that "supposidly" the security check that causes the crash on "burned" copies of the game only takes effect once, in the first 5 min of ACT 1. So, in theory, loading in someones SAVED game, that begins on ACT 2, will bypass this entirely. Not sure where the saved games are stored, didn't bother to check (since mine is now working). But trust me when I say you realy WONT be missing much by starting in ACT 2. (Unless of course you REALY enjoy chopping wood... :P)
Sorry my advice isn't as interesting as "edit this, delete that...etc etc..."
Someone give that "saved game" thing a try... let me know, and I'll post my saved games on "ARES"
Those of you who are struggling to get the game running... stick with it, it's well worth it.