OK, so how does this DC patching thing work
 

Could someone please tell me how in the world to put one of those patch things into a DC game and what I need to do it (in plain english would be nice).

what are you patching
usually you get instrux, with the zip download for the patch

regards
webber

try using applyppf.I Just put applyppf.exe and the patch(*.ppf) in a dir like selfboot, through msdos go to the directory the patch and the binfile is and type this: applyppf *.bin *.ppf
* being the name of the files that dir